lets-go-lesbos: penis ≠ man. vagina ≠ woman.
didiex: worrying constantly that youre a disappointment to everyone you care about (ʘ‿ʘ )
humming-metallica-in-the-tardis: amon-fire: fuckyourfreckles: rizaoftheowls: derinthemadscientist: stolenpandorica: elisetheawesome: kyoukokiriqiri: why do we call periods “periods” when we can call them something cooler like “bloodstain fever” or ”the crimson horror” are u guys okay Vaginebola Red Tide Warning shark week the red wave i second shark week
milajewnis: but actually plaid button up shirts with the sleeves rolled to the elbows are universally attractive
sherwat: chrissykilljoybitchtits: inc-omparable: im-fandoomed: hitlervevo: why the fuck cant we text the police lets say there is a murderer in ur house and you’re hiding behind your sofa and you do have your phone with you but you can’t call the police because the murderer might hear you Here in Canada you can Here in England we just… scream and run Here in Scotland we paint our...
they-call-me-wonder-woman: h0odrich: It’s mad depressing when u eat the last piece of candy but you didn’t look at the bag and realize it was the last one so you could truly appreciate it for what it was worth This speaks to me on a deep emotional level.
thebirdsandthebuckets: beatnikgarbageartist: nightlifemingus: beatnikgarbageartist: nightlifemingus: beatnikgarbageartist: nightlifemingus: beatnikgarbageartist: nightlifemingus: thanks bro, you’re too thanks dude, you know dang man this post just got really yr right we should have set the rules to one joke you realize this means oh it’s this time...
We're all going to be such messed up parents.
sodamnrelatable: Kid doesn’t like Harry Potter: Eating is good. Fried chicken is life. Fuck the healthy foods. YOUR is possession. YOU’RE is stating you are something. Laziness is okay. Sun is bad for you anyway. Music shall be your life. Rock out always! And finally: Everything is funnier when it falls/explodes. VERY FUNNY CANNOT NOT REBLOG OHMYGOD omg that house
To everyone who is in recovery today
If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces” that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now! Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.
When people consistently like/reblog my posts, I...
funniestshit: I end up staring at my notifications like: http://funniestshit.tumblr.com/
when I actually do an assignment and the teacher...
Laying in bed, remembering a conversation in your...
Gadge shippers: Look, Suzanne Collins almost made Gale and Madge canon.
Finnie shippers: Yes, Finnick and Annie actually were canon until *chokes up and cries*
Everlark shippers: *holds Finnie shippers* At least you didn't have to deal with a trilogy's worth of sexual tension
Hayffie shippers: We idolize a relationship between a clueless and ignorant Capitolian woman and a middle-aged alcoholic who both hate each other and were never going to be canon. We literally freak out when they're in the same room and don't kill each other...
Gadge shippers: ...
Finnie shippers: ...
Everlark shippers: ...
Hayffie shippers: ...yeah.
I laugh at my own texts before i send them... →
When You Finally get a Moment ALONE with Your...